Personal : Happy Ever After?

rebecca plotnick Eiffel Tower

Over Christmas, I was visiting my sister and niece in Florida. Emma is three and a half and still very into the princess phase. While sitting in the back seat she asked me to read her a book, “Snow White” We weren’t even finished with the first paragraph and there was a line that said “Snow White was waiting for her Prince Charming to come rescue her” I stopped immediately and shut the book. I turned to Emma and told her that she didn’t have to wait for Prince Charming to rescue her she could do whatever she wanted to do and it could be done on her own!

Quickly I went into panic mode as I sometimes say things around my sister that I get in trouble in regards to how they raise Emma. But my sister chimed in quickly that Emma could do whatever she wanted to do when she grew up and she didn’t have to wait for anyone to rescue her. My sister listed off Mommy, doctor, lawyer, teacher, nurse, photographer, artist, and so on. My sister and I lead very different lives she works full time and has been married for 11 years. I am the single  aunt that comes to visit but also I support myself full time as an artist. 

Times have changed so much from when “Snow White” was originally written but it’s so important that Emma knows she doesn’t have to wait for anyone to make her dreams come true.

For the longest time I have wanted to write a book… It’s been my dream, and the one thing that has stopped me is literally the fact that there is no “fairy tale ending” I kept saying I can’t write a book because my story isn’t complete. Which in some ways saying that what I told Emma was true. In the back of my head I felt the only way to write a story was to be resuced by prince charming.

What if I was the hero to my own story? 

This past year, I have stayed single a bit by choice to give my self some space and learn to love myself. I have been more creative than ever and when I look back at my relationship I was much happier being out of it than in it. I have laughed harder and smiled more. I swear my wrinkles around my eyes have grown. But they are a symbol of me loving life than I really don’t mind much. 

rebecca plotnick Eiffel Tower

So here I am a single girl on Valetnine’s Day and I am happy. Loving yourself and putting yourself first is hard work, but it’s worth it. So until the right person comes along I will continue to travel and enjoy life because you shouldn’t have to wait for anything or anyone to be happy. 

rebecca plotnick eiffel tower

I would love to know your thoughts. Single or Taken? Do you agree with Disney or are you a more modern thinker? 

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  1. Happy V Day! Great post and I totally agree with you. Often we end up bumping into our prince when we least expect, while we are busy building our dreams and focusing on something else. I believe self development is so important and taking time out for you before meeting any man.
    My quick story is I followed my dreams to move to China for self development purposes….language learning, independence building, taking the road less travelled to find myself and while there, I found my passion which was working with children so I took training in Montessori teaching and began to love my life. I felt totally fulfilled, made amazing friends and travelled Asia, single! While living my dreams and being the hero in my own story…then I met the man who found me living my life to the fullest! Now we are married with a little boy in Chicago. I don’t think it is the end of our love story yet as we only met 4 years ago but it’s a fun story to share and my advice is this…make the most of your single days, of living alone, of being able to get up when you want, go to sleep when YOU want, travel when and where you like. Live each day for you. Learn something new and continue self development and chasing your dreams. Only then will you find a man and rescue him from his mundane, empty bachelor life and both of you can enjoy the challenge of living happily ever after! Give up trying to write your love story and hand the pen over to the universe or God allowing them to write that for you! Just focus on writing your travel adventures and continue doing what you are doing!

  2. I am a hopeless romantic and serial monogamist… however I couldn’t quite settle down with any of my boyfriends.

    So, independent of any man, I took a year abroad in college, took a month-long cross-country trip around the US, bought a house, adopted a dog, flew and drove alone all over the US, and then at 32 I started planning to move (alone) from the East Coast (US) to either California or Chile (I dreamed of living abroad again and I speak a very small amount of Spanish).

    I’ve never believed I needed a man to save me from anything or to do anything. Both of my parents and all of my friends support the perspective that women can do anything regardless of their marital status.

    That said, I do think I held myself back from doing a lot of things. I think I was afraid of the risks and also deterred by the sheer amount of work involved in achieving some of my dreams. I never thought a man would fix that though. I guess I hoped a partner would simply take on some of the work to do! Haha. 🙂

    Completely by chance, at 32 I met a man at a wedding in France (that I almost decided to not attend!!) and we fell crazy in love and got married 8 months later. Now my life is a total Disney classic, because my husband is French and we live in Paris!

    I’m so glad for all the risks I took before I met him and all the adventures I had. I only wish I had taken bigger risks earlier and chased my dreams a little harder. 🙂

    • Hi Tammy!

      You are so lucky to be living a Disney Classic! Where do you live in Paris? I have been told by many women who have married later and found their love that I need to live my life. I hope that the person I am supposed to meet will find me on my journey. In the meantime, I am working on making myself a better person.

      I will remember to take big risks and adventures. Thank you for your words and the reminder! xo

  3. Happy Valentine’s Day! I agree with you 100 percent. Life is too short to wait for the perfect time. The perfect time might be right now. Book the flight, buy the shoes and do what makes you happy. As a writer, I always try to remind myself to write my own story – and have made many changes as of late as well! So cheers to you for doing just that and following your heart. xoxo

  4. Cheers and Happy Valentine’s to you from another single, 35 year old Chicagoan who is loving life. I don’t want to be single forever, but I am making the most of my life while I am.

    • Being single has its ups and downs for sure. Enjoy your freedom and I hope you do something fabulous to celebrate who you are!! xo

  5. I adore this girlfriend! You are so right! A few years ago I came to a realization that we have all come to glorify these fairytales where the girl gets the guy and they live happily ever after. We get so focused on the happily ever after part that we fail to recognize the amount of trials they had to go through first- missing parents (almost any Disney movie ever), becoming the help (Cinderella) , grass-is-greener syndrome (Little Mermaid)… the list goes on and on. We are each writing our fairy tale- right now. We get to choose our path and our perspective!
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    • Chloé beautifully put! Thank you! I know it’s hard that we don’t focus on all the struggles that get us to the end we just want to fast forward to the fairytale part. We absolutely get to choose our path and how we live our lives. Wishing you all the best and I really appreciate you reading. xo

  6. I totally can relate to this blog. You pretty much describe most of my story except mine I have a nephew. Lol. I really admired your honesty and bravery. Thank you for sharing.

    • Thank you so much, Mary! It is hard work but putting you first but it is so important. I hope you are loving life with your nephew and teaching him to be a strong guy! I have a nephew too and they are just the sweetest!

  7. I love your honesty! Life is not a fairytale…there’s no ending…it’s always a work in progress, no matter what path we chose to take. I am loving your path. Thank you for sharing.

    • Thank you Leyla! It is very true that life is a work in progress. If things came easy I don’t think I would appreciate them as much as I do when they are a challenge. I am so happy that our lives crossed paths when they did. You encourage me to be a better person and I hope you write your parenting tips down for that day when I become a mom 🙂